It's day 60!!!
My, that's gone fast. I'm so proud of myself and the weight is dropping off at the moment, about a pound a day for the last few days. Another thing is that the food packs are really filling me up at the moment. I'm mostly on the soups and feeling absolutely stuffed afterwards. Some days I'm only having 3 food packs because I really can't manage more. I think my stomach has shrunk.
I'm also noticeably smaller. My hips and tummy are smaller! Hurrah!
The really special thing about today is that my scales are showing me at 15 stone 3 pounds which is the lightest I can remember being as an adult. This is very significant for me and signals the two and a half stone loss mark, again, something I can't ever remember. Obviously my immediate thought was "Wow, that's brilliant, I should celebrate this. Let's buy some cheese." Clearly there's a long way to go yet mentally and physically!
I've pottered about the new house today getting things in their new proper places. I also made curry for the boy which smelled amazing, and I don't normally like his curries. A little bit of cream in it and I would have scoffed it!
One thing that was interesting today was I got really stressed about something (I won't bore you with the details) and got very panicked. I had to take myself away and calm myself down. It made me think about coping strategies for stress and how I would normally have felt anxious for the rest of the day, resulting in a night in front of the TV eating takeaway until I felt sick. Instead, I used some of the counselling we've been looking at recently which is about how to manage worries. I spend a lot of my time feeling anxious about stuff- mostly about things that I really don't need to feel anxious about. This time I managed it by thinking the issue through carefully, remaining positive and doing everything I can to sort it out. I still feel anxious about it, because it's not something that is completely in my control, so I then used distraction techniques like putting music on and sorting out the stuff in the kitchen. It made me feel loads better than a takeaway. This is the kind of thing that I'm going to need in the future so I don't turn to food.
I think I need something in my head every time I go to eat something asking me "why are you eating this?" because the only right answer is "because I'm hungry and this is the right food/right portion for me". Anything else and I need to manage it in a different way. Also, it would be nice to work on the anxieties I carry around with me over stupid things. We did look at that in a previous counselling session so maybe I need to revisit it.
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